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December 1st, Annually.


Don’t bother with the Christmas tree

And decking out the hall

Don’t start singing jingle songs

Humbug to it all


Let’s scrap giving presents

It’s over-rated  trash

In this economic climate

You must be careful with your cash


I just want to stay at home

Unsociable and glum

Buy your own selection box

Cos I’m a  mardy bum.


The days are short, the nights are long

I’ve got no yuletide cheer

So, until the shortest day has passed

You’ll find no Christmas here


December 22nd, Annually


The tree is up, the lights are on

I’ve got a  glass of wine

I’ve wrapped up all the presents

It’s going to be just fine


Have another chocolate

And get the family in

Have a Merry Christmas

Let festivities begin.


Put some Christmas music on

And watch yer grandad dance

He’ll get you under t’mistletoe

If he gets half a chance


My winter blues are over

I’m ready now at last.

I always feel much better

With the winter solstice passed.